So which is it?
Really, it’s BOTH – and that’s probably why everyone is so confused.
There are really two distinctly different types of sexuality – masculine and feminine (and actually, many shades of gray in between). For our purposes here, we’ll talk about these two polar aspects. Masculine sexuality is rooted in the first chakra and feminine sexuality resides more in the second chakra.
Now notice I didn’t say “male sexuality” or “female sexuality,” but “masculine” and “feminine” sexuality. This is because I want to make a distinction between gender and archetypes.
In general, it’s better to talk about archetypes, since there are men who actually express more of a “feminine sexuality” and women who have more of a “masculine sexuality.”
Typically, though, a woman will express the feminine archetype, and a man will exhibit the masculine archetype. For this reason, I’m going to talk about men as masculine and women as feminine – with full awareness that I’m generalizing for our purposes here, and that there are certainly exceptions to the “rule.”
Masculine sexuality has a strong physical drive, and is singularly penetrative by nature. Feminine sexuality has far less drive and is receptive and other-oriented.
This has been shown through the administration of hormones to pre-op sex-change patients. Men who opt to change into women take female hormones and report a decrease in their sex drive, but an increase in their emotionality. And women who choose to become men take male hormones and generally report an increase in their sex drive.
The first chakra is about survival and basic instincts and drives, so sexuality is much more of a basic, physical need for men than it is for women. The second chakra is about flow and receptivity, duality and intimacy. For women, sex is less of a basic drive and more of a way to connect emotionally with another; a form of intimacy.
For a heterosexual couple to more fully experience energetic/spiritual connection during sex, they can learn to navigate into each other’s typical mode. A man can learn to move his sexual energy up into his second chakra and connect more deeply with his female lover. As he moves into his second chakra, some of his natural drive diminishes, and he becomes less goal-oriented and more sensitive to his partner’s needs, the intimacy and connection grow.
Quite interestingly, when he does this, his partner gets more aroused, and her masculine (first chakra) sexual drive kicks in more fully. Basically, as he begins connecting with her on her level, she naturally reciprocates and starts joining him on a deeper level of physical lust.
In some relationships, the male may actually exhibit the female needs and the woman may show more sex drive. In these cases, the roles described above might be reversed. But the point is still this — if each partner adapts to the other’s needs, they can co-create a sexual experience that includes the physical drive of the first chakra combined with the emotional intimacy and connection of the second chakra.
When they each come halfway, they meet in the chakra nexus –where the first and second chakras meet — and they create a powerful unified energy field that can then move up the chakras toward more and more ecstatic states, and sex becomes an immensely healing and pleasurable, spiritual experience for both partners.
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